Unbroken: The tale of one BVB army members bullying story

Here I am putting BVB in all my major posts again. Will I stop. No.I regret nothing at all. I owe a debit to them. They mean the world to me. I have to admit that they are the only band that’s music that’s covered everything I was every going through at the moment in time. The fact that I was a former of their band and now I love them now makes me love and appreciate them that much more. So BVB for life and BVB forever.

Lets get started on my bullying story shall we. Bullying was very prominent in my life. From family members calling me abusive derogatory names to friends/non friends going behind my back and calling me names for being who I was. I also been bullied by doctors who were supposed to take care of my health needs. To online haters(PFTT Trolls)

My childhood consisted of people treating me abnormally from the get go. I was very slow in the head and still am to this day. I have ADD which I will sit there and think everything through before doing it properly. I have very OCDish ways. I have developed habits to get things done but now days its especially hard to do cause I am now disabled but still I get things done. I will always be the last person to get their assignments in at the end of the day when everyone else was playing/ reading which they were supposed to in the classroom. I would always get called “Slow Poke” “Look at the cow still doing her assignments still” in grade school. I would get bullied because of the fact I had to go to special education classes and I was very overweight still am to this day. I struggle with my weight every day. The kids would snicker and say “Look at those idiots going to the idiot class,etc.” I got that all the way through high school.

Middle school was fun fun. Where kids got to experience PE for the first time in locker rooms. I was very afraid of all these girls that made fun of me throughout elementary school. Girls like to bully behind backs and start rumors for the sake of their gossip. Boys just beat the shit out of each other just for the hell of it. But sometimes those lines get switched sometimes where the boys like to gossip and girls beat the shit out of each other for the hell of it.

During PE I would get intentional balls thrown at my head cause I was in my own world dreaming about bands and being an interviewer/ being my weird self as usual. They would do it intentionally cause I was having fun with being myself. I would get lol’d at if I could not do a certain PE activity. When I broke my foot my freshman year during my last year every to take PE. I thank god for that fateful thing to happen to me.

Sports was a very humiliating experience for me. I would see girls whisper to another girl about me about my weight and how I looked. My freshman year was the last time I did volleyball ever as a manager because the bullying got so bad and the coaches good ole boy system was bring back bad memories for me for when I played volleyball in middle school. My schools coaches run by the good ole boy system. I have seen talent ruined because their parents were not fucking rich in my town. So they put the rich kids in that may not have the talent so their reputations as a coach looking fucking awesome. There are good coaches out there but all the coaches in my area can go suck a big one.

In high school I got called a nark ass bitch because I told on someone for doing a childish act. I felt like an outcast in that high school. I never was liked by an boy. The only date I ever went on was in 7th grade and that was it. He ran away when I was going to kiss him on the cheek. Gave up on men till now. But now I am happy with being single. People think I am lonely but I am really not. People…..

The times my bullying ever got physical was during break times I would get pushed into lockers on my way to and from classes. In PE several times. I got punched on purpose for no reason at all on the bus and in school. Little did they know. They built a monster that was going to one day show these fuckers one day “Look at me now, now look at yourselves. Now what?” But do it the most positive way possible way possible. Guess what you are reading it. The monster they made me into will one day in the near future will be one of the greatest’s rock and roll journalists on this planet.

When I was in high school I got called a disgrace to metal because metal music was the only thing that was helping me cope at the time. People did not realize their fucking glares at me, their backstabs behind my back, their derogatory terms against me were the fucking reason why I turned forever goth in middle school. I still listen to all the music I listened too middle school. I have forgiven all my bullies for what they have done to me but I will never forget.

When I got bullied about my weight I would be called such as fat fuck, tub a wubba, lardass, fatass, jelly belly, fatso with the retardo, etc.

I have been bullied by doctors. Doctors have bullied me about my weight issues and they think I am a drug addict, hypochondriac, or has a sever case of Munchausen’s disorder. Or I caught one writing in my doctor notes and it read “Its all in her head: Here for drugs.” Never been so humiliated in my entire life. These doctors are suppose to be professional and treat their patients equally. I got the shitty stick on their hand when I arrived to receive help with my life long headaches to only get their oh I am tired and need a nap why are you here go away. I also was told by the doctor that diagnosed me with ADD that I will never graduate high school and never amount to anything in life. Well guess what doctor. I owned you both of those. I got my high school diploma and now I have something I AM FANTASTIC at is being a journalist and writing. So doctors that have bullied me take your words and shove it.

To all my bullies my bullies. Wait a minute. I have nothing to say to them only to have a nice life. Cause I have nothing I want to ever say to them. Not worth my time. Ever. Period.

Family members have called me a bitch, weirdo, waste of space, etc. Its horrible how family has to treat each other like that. In the metal and rock and roll community family I never been called those terms. Makes me appreciate and love music that much more.

I have promised myself I will never be like them. I will only do whats right for myself. Bullying is never okay. If you see someone get bullied stand up for them. I never stood up against mine. But now days I do stand up for people. People should not be bullied because of their color of their skin, sexual orientation, what band/artist they listen to, what they wear, what their favorite foods are, or being who they are. People should yet instead love each other for who each other are. We are only human. WE need to live. “Stand up for what you believe in, even if it means standing alone”-Andy Biersack 

Bullying is stupid in the first place. People who bully people need to do something positive with their lives versus picking on people. Its mind blowing the stories I have read about it in the newspapers about kids murdering kids and all this kind of bullshit. The world is going to hell. So stand up if you seeing ANY bullying being made.

Unbroken is the title of this blog article about my personal story about my bullying story. “If we stand together we will be unbroken” Is a powerful sentence one can remember forever. What Black Veil Brides stands for as a band in its message is what my dream team band wanted to be like and its came true. There’s a band out there to stand against this. I know there are several bands out there with similar messages but to have their main focus as to helping kids through bullshit and to have this army to give us a backbone to kick society in the ass is one amazing band in my eyes. BVB will go far in life. I am glad to be on the train with them to see their journeys unfold. BVB is a rarity of the world. I am so glad I gave them a second chance. I never regret once. BVB has changed my life for the better.

If you are getting bullied take Andy Biersack’s “Fuck You, Motherfucker” approach to it and flip them off. ;). Stand up for yourself. Be yourself. YOU are amazing for who YOU are. Always remember “Never Give In, Never Back Down.” cause you can fight this “One final fight fight for this tonight, woah, with Knives and Pens we made our plight.”

BLACK VEIL BRIDES WILL ALWAYS BE OUR UNSUNG HERO’S THROUGH THE THICK AND THIN, THEY HAVE OUR BACKS WHEN NO ONE IS THEIR AT TIMES, THEY MAY THINK THEY ARE NOBODY’S HERO BUT REALLY IN THE END HERO’S COME IN ALL SHAPES AND SIZES BUT OURS COMES IN WARPAINT, BLACK, AND GLAMOROUS.

RISE UP AND CELEBRATE YOUR LIFE

CAUSE

WE SCREAM,

WE SHOUT,

WE ARE THE FALLEN ANGELS……..

NEVER GIVE IN, NEVER BACK DOWN.

IN THE END AS YOU FADE INTO THE NIGHT, WHO WILL TELL THE STORY OF YOUR LIFE

CAUSE “YOU HAVE”

THE LEGACY

BORN FROM A DREAM

ROSE FROM THE STREETS

WITH LEATHER WINGS

WITH HANDS ON DESTINY……………………

CAUSE “IF WE STAND TOGETHER WE ALL WILL BE UNBROKEN.”

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Written By: Mariah L. Hanna

If you steal my words without my twitter handle proper credit in the copyright at the bottom of the page. I will haunt you down. Steal all your potatoes. Issue you a ban slip for potatoes for life. lol. 😉

Copyright @PotatoBVBQueen 10/9/13

The Amazing BVB/BFMV show: The time of my life.

Home is where the heart is. Right. Well last night I felt at “Home” for the first time in a long time. In a room full of my peers, people that were like minded like me, people who are as Andy said “Freaks” in the whole room, people with commonalities, people who enjoy similar interest with yourself, and people who enjoy the same things as you do.  The list may go on forever but you as the reader get the story.

I would like to mention the fact that any part of me as a BVB hater is gone. Its now filled with love and admiration of a band I once hated. I agree hating this band was a totally shame for me to do. But on that fateful day back in January 27th the best thing a hater could ever do is converting. That’s what I did. I fell in love with their music for their message and what they stand for as a band in this fucked up world. They give me hope knowing that they truly care about their fans and they are so active with their fan base. What sold me to convert while I did some major research about BVB back in January is the fact that their songs intertwine with the dredgers of everyday life. I cried so hard reading the positive dark lyrics from all their recent and old songs. Everything I have negatively read about them was WRONG. I love the fact that they don’t take shit from anyone. The famous quote from Andy now in vest form “Fuck You Motherfucker” is very imminent.

So here I am talking about converting. Some people do convert. Change is a good and positive thing in peoples lives. BVB has forever changed mine. I know what I want to do for the rest of my life career wise because of them. They have pulled this side of me I never KNEW I had. I never knew I had a knack for words. I knew I had a knack for the lovely art of words but never had I thought to become a journalist. This is like my wildest dream come true. So all the worlds “Thank You” cards in the world can’t tell BVB thank you enough. Thank you BVB for coming into my life and making everything fabulous.

Now its time to talk about the amazing concert. SO many things happened their. Many funny, weird, WTF, Heart-touching moments, and awesome moments. Lets get started shall we.

Yesterday started as any normal day for me. Little did I know my life was going to change that night forever. My mom and I drove from my home from Orofino, Idaho to Spokane, WA which is a 2-3 hour drive on max. It was so worth it. My mom and I had to make pit stops along the way. We left early. Got to Spokane fine. Visited my grandma for an hour that lives in Spokane I don’t see her that much. Left early from her place to get to the venue to get a parking spot and pay for parking which was worth it. My mom and I walked into the wrong part of the building of the Knitting Factory almost saw a film. Talking about hilarious. We got directed to the RIGHT building. Shit happens. Go through the line at the concert okay. My mom was having a bit of a cultural shock cause of all the phenomenally dressed BVB army. I would like to say the effort that they put into their looks was perfect. With my extensive education on BVB I knew what everyone’s face painted were all from what BVB Era whether it be from We Stitch These Wounds Era, Set This World on Fire Era, and Wretched and Divine: The Story of the Wild Ones Era. Congrats to all those who dressed so amazingly. YOU all did a perfect job.

BVB puts on amazing live performances. Their efforts towards everything they do is such a NEED in all things rock and roll. I agree with Alice Cooper and what he said about rock and roll being anemic. We NEED bands like Black Veil Brides, Bullet For My Valentine, Throw The Fight, and Stars in The Stereo, etc to pump the iron in the veins of rock and roll to make it lively again.

BVB I am so fucking proud of you all. YOU really showed them haters what was up last night. Andy you pile drived them even before they had the chance to even flip you all off. HAHA. Way to get to the bull before grabbing its horns. I love your speech about the haters not listening to your music and not having any generalized evidence to back up their claims of their hate. YOU sir have got my full support and love to back your band. I love BVB. I also love your speech about us fans being ourselves and never let some motherfucker take control us plus live our dreams sort of speak. They fact you told us all that BVB loved us. Made me cry so hard. I felt so at home last night. BVB you made my whole life.

PSSTTT Andy with your speech against the haters you shut up three 1986’s haters in the back where I was. They were crossing the arms as you always tell it. I got to experience it. I was like the fuck. It really happened. They didn’t look happy. They look like grumpy cat. LOL Good for you Andy you shut them up before they even got to you and flipped you off. GO ANDY!

CC did his famous CC drum dance last night. I nearly died of laughter. It was epic. He banged the hell out of his drumset during their entire performance.

Jake and Jinxx played the hell out of their guitar’s. Their musical chemistry is banana potato nuts I will tell you. Plus they sang really well too during the gang vocals.

Andy sang with perfect vocalization. His deep voice compliments his singing abilities. I am really pleased with his and his bands performance abilities. I am just wowed by them. I hope many people become fans of them and many of them infamous haters wake up, smell the coffee, and become fans of them cause they are incredible.

BFMV blew my mind as well. I have been a fan of their for nearly a decade. I started liking BFMV music back in 2005 in my Junior High years. I was referred to them through by Atreyu and Avenged Sevenfold. So seeing them for the first time last night was “Bittersweet Memories” when they played all their hits and their new music ranging from ‘P.O.W’, ‘Tears Don’t Fall” which was the last song the crowd chanted for it and we GOT what we chanted for, “Temper,Temper” to “Your Betrayal” which is fucking awesome live, EVERYTHING was epic live. I died and went to heaven 666 times 😉 In reference to BVB playing a cover of “Fiend Club”by the Misfits. I was shocked when BVB played “Perfect Weapon” off of their first CD We Stitch These Wounds. I cherished that moment. Everything BVB played from “Shadows Die”, “Nobody’s Hero”, “Wretched and Divine”, “Perfect Weapon”, “In The End”, and “Fallen Angels”. Everything they played was perfect and well done.

The openers were fantastic too. Throw the Fight and Stars in Stereo did a fantastic job. Congrats to them for doing such a swell job. The lead singer of Throw The Fight really touched me. I would like to say Stay Strong and congrats to him for kicking cancers ass. I may not have cancer but I do have a life threatening disease and also a rare disease also. Keep kicking ass. Plus his shout out to the troops had me tear up cause the recent revelation of my deceased friend/classmate who served in the Air Force. She unfortunately took her life while serving cause the military life was too much for her to handle. So thank you to the lead singer of Throw the Fight for doing so.

I also talked with fellow BVB army members. It was amazing to do so. I cherished the conversations I had with them. One made a homemade “Rebels” vest for 3 dollars. It was amazingly done that I know BVB would be so proud of her in her vest.

Now its time for the get out the tissues section part of my article. I love these two people with all my heart. They were in the disabled section of the venue at the Knitting Factory. One man in his late forties or early fifties was permanently disabled in his move around electric wheelchair. I talked with him a bit. I probably made his day cause I told him he was amazing and to stay strong. He could talk but I barely could not understand what he was saying but I have worked with these type of people before and so I knew how to properly conversate with them. He was having the time of his life which made my whole life that much sweeter. If that does not take the cake there was a 15 year old girl who had a rare disorder that makes her wheelchair bound. Her and I may not have the same rare disorders but the commonality of her and I having rare disease together made me cry inside. I AM HOME. I screamed that in my head. She was such a lovely girl. My mom and I had a lovely short conversation with her dad and her. She is such a strong girl. I wish her the best in life, stay strong, and that she is not alone. Me and her hugged twice. After meeting her and the sweet man. I already was emotional now I am double emotional. These two people are two amazing walks of life. I commend her father unlike my mom for taking me to the show for also taking her to the concert last night as well and letting her live her life outside the disability like I was that night. To anyone who has disability and listens to like minded music. Keep fighting the fight. Stay strong and positive. Keep your head up High. As BVB aptly puts it “Never give in, Never back down.” Yes, “YOU’re all amazing.”

Now its time to talk about the funny and WTF moments. I seen someone dressed up as a psychedelic manitar and an uncle keeping an eye on his niece and her friends with a wig on drunk as hell. Don’t worry he was not gonna drive them home. They were going to walk home because their home was a walking distance away from the venue. Which relieved me. He told my mom and I that he was their to “Fuck their plans up and torture them.” The WTF moment was when this chick with a see through shirt on did not have a bra on underneath. I am all for class and dressing decent to rock shows. Which all of you girls dressed appropriately except that one older lady. The hell. lol. But Jesus ladies put bras on when you go to shows. Even though the world love’s boobies. Even if you are one of those ladies that like’s to give the band their bras. Which in my eye’s to each their own on this one. I do not do cause of my own views but if another person want’s to do do it out of admiration for the band. So be it. This has been done for years in rock and roll where ladies have thrown their panties or bras up on the stage as an incentive to the band. I watch to many documentaries on Vh1 classic about this sort of thing about rock and roll in 80’s. Haha. So ladies if you are old enough to throw your bra up on the stage please bring a “Gag Bra” that’s the one you throw and keep the one you have on, ON. Please and thank you. Cause I saw little “Black Veil Brides Army Members in training” their. Yes their was kiddies their. Just a little thought to all you older ladies. Keep it classy ladies.

I also want to THANK ALL of the people of their hygienic odors last night. THAT was the first ever concert I went to without smelling BO but I did smell some drive by shootings aka walk by farts. EW. Thank all your parents for raising you all well for having good hygiene values.

I did not get to meet any bands. But I did get to meet Jesse Lee, BVB’s merch dude. He was a kind, sweet, and awesome guy. I gave him my “BVB Former Hater Surrender Slip” to him to give to BVB. Which I fangirled so hard for hours on end. Still am right now. BVB deserved that so much. I love them very much. They get so much hate and to have a “BVB Former Hater Surrender Slip” is quite nerve racking to tell you. I also baptized myself with water after BVB’s set to symbolize that I am no longer a hater but a fan of a beautiful band with such a beautiful message.

I vow to never hate them ever again. I also shamed myself there at the show with the sign. HAHA. I had the guts to do it and I raised the sign and waved it in surrender. Best feeling in my life. It was so great to know that the band that gets so much hate has one of their former haters surrendering at one of their shows. Ain’t that neat. I was the one that did that. I will never forget that show. NEVER. I plan on going to more BVB shows in the future. Plus BFMV in the future as well.

The intro to BVB’s set had feels up the ying yang. I can’t tell you how nerve racking it is. Once the lights went out. I said oh fuck here we go. My stomach was in knots plus not feeling well because of my health conditions but I braved the storm anyway and went to the concert. Instead of drinking soda I drank tons of water. Water is good kids. Keeps yeah hydrated. Plus the bands were drinking their water too. Positive output of all the bands live performances. Plus they drank monster instead of alcohol on stage. I knew they were keeping that for after the show. Bands that do that in front of young crowds like that not only win approval ratings in my eyes but positive feedback from the parents as well. THANK you bands for doing that. That was a cool “Sober” observation I saw.

To wrap up this huge article. I am glad knowing that I have buried the BVB former hater I was forever. BVB deserves me as a fan. I am glad I woke up and smelled the coffee sooner rather than later. As one of my BVB friends told me before I went to the show. BVB makes YOUR dreams come true. That for the fact is true in every form. They have directed me in the right path in my life. So all in all have fun with your lives. Life is too short to HATE all the time. Always try something new. Befriend a new buddy who is lonely. Treat others with love, respect, and dignity. Have some potatoes(They kick heart disease right in the ass). Enjoy your life people have it much worse than you in the world. Have a laugh. Blast your music really loud. Follow your dreams. Be yourself. Last but not least don’t forget to tell someone you love, you love them.

BFMV did a phenomenal job performing live I have no words to say about it. It was that phenomenal. 

But BVB playing live in front on me. Was the cherry on top of the banana sundae. Absolutely amazing live. No words can tell you the reader reading this on your computer or on  your mobile device somewhere in the world how beautiful and powerful BVB is live.

I wish these guys nothing but the best in their lives and musical endeavours. They all mean the world to me and to every fan they have touched and helped throughout the world. Music is the key to everything in life. Everything beautiful and natural in life.

So glad I went. I have memories to last a lifetime. So excited to see what my future brings and what it entails. So happy for everything in my life.

I love you all in the BVB army. YOU all mean the world too me. Thank you for being in it now.

BLACK VEIL BRIDES WILL DOMINATE THIS EARTH….BECAUSE..WE SCREAM…WE SHOUT…BECAUSE WE ARE THE FALLEN ANGELS….. BECAUSE…..IN THE END….. WE ARE LEGION….FOR WE ARE MANY…NEVER GIVE IN..NEVER BACK DOWN

PS Knitting Factory why the fuck does your venue with your vents  certain area’s smell like Subway sandwiches. YOU made me extremely hungry for subway. Shame on you for not having Subway for all of us.

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Written by: Mariah L. Hanna

Journalists note: These are my thoughts and words that went on during the BVB/BFMV show that was in Spokane, WA at the Knitting Factory. You may use my words but please use my twitter handle as accreditation if using my words on your own blog. If you don’t. I will track you down. Steal all of the potato made products in your home and give you a ban slip from ever purchasing potato made products ever again. 😉

Copyright @PotatoBVBQueen 10/4/13

The anticipation of the magical Black Veil Brides concert: The feelings one concertgoer goes through

Here I am again writing about the lovely Black Veil Brides. I regret nothing at all. *Insert Andy Not Giving A Fuck Meme here* I love these guys for the rest of my life. I am about to see these guys in 5 days with my mom as a her Birthday present from me. Her birthday is on October 2nd. The concert lands on October 3rd at the Knitting Factory in Spokane, WA.

What do I have to say about this. Almost every positive word in the world. This show means the world to me. I am not only to give my mom the best birthday present a daughter could to a mom. I am also surrendering as an ex-BVB hater and closing that chapter of myself behind me. Even though I have moved on and gone to better things. It is time for me to go to the source and tell them for my wrongdoings. Plus tell them that I love them with all my heart for coming into my life during a difficult time. BVB is truly one phenomenal band not because of the fact that they write and play amazing songs. Its for the fact that they have helped thousands of peoples lives including myself. Its truly inspiring and amazing. Glad to be apart of the BVB army and family.

I appreciate everyone that has taken me in with open arms already in the BVB army. I mean I was a hater of this band that helped all of you and you all choose to love me and care about me. I am so thankful and more than appreciative of it. You all could have shunned me out and hated on me. But you all did not. But instead you all gave me love and support. My gratitude is everlasting cause of all your actions over the course of the months I have been fresh in the BVB army. I wish I could give you all more than just thank yous. I love you BVB army with all with all my heart.

The feelings I am getting now for the impending Black Veil Brides show is astounding. I have been waiting for more than three months for this show. The fact that I am seeing them live in 5 days is just brain racking to me. I can’t believe I am going to see them live. Its just……

I anticipate on having a good time and nothing but a good time. I hardly ever get to go to concert’s that very much due to the fact that I live on a strict income, my medical issues, and travel issues. But when the perfect time does strike that I do get to go do these things. I take the opportunities and go forth on them. I cherish every waking moment of any concert I go to. If i meet any musician at a concert its like having mashed potatoes and gravy with fries. Its very awesome.

Concerts feel like a second “Home” to me. I feel at home their among people that I have a lot of commonalities with and share like interests. I love the fact that bands bring together people. Sometimes bands help people find their soul-mates in some cases. Its beyond fascinating at the world of music and what it does for people. It brings people closer and brings joy and healing to Earths human beings.

Music is very powerful in that sense that I would like to say Black Veil Brides music hits it at every “Take It To The Next Level” height in music. I love the fact that Black Veil Brides music can spin off discussions in a lot of positivity and the dreaded negativity posts, comments, tweets, etc from the BVB haters which I was at one point in my life. I do apologize to BVB for being one though(As I said before I have moved on and started a beautiful journey being a lovely BVB fan for life.). BVB and any other musician don’t deserve hate for no reason at all. I have one question for all of you haters. What did Andy, CC, Jinxx, Jake, and “Former” do to you? Its very fascinating to me that BVB does charity work and goes out of their way to make their fans or other people happy. It truly makes me happy knowing that. So all this name calling and such is just insane to me. I never when I was the “BVB hater” keeped all the hateful rude comments to myself. I have learned my lessons. That is never say something bad about something you haven’t given a chance to unless you already have given it a chance. Mark my words it will help you the reader in the long run. 😉

Fuck hating. I hate all the hate BVB gets. Period. They DON’T deserve none of it at all.

BVB means the world to me. I don’t know what my life would be without them now. Its amazing to know that people like them are out their. I love them with all of my heart. I love everyone in the BVB army as well.

To Andy, CC, Jake, Jinxx, and “Former”. I hope you four lovely men know that you all are doing the right things in life. Never stop doing what you all are doing. Keep doing a phenomenal job. I hope more of me does convert and apologize to BVB for their wrongdoings. I hope one day we all can live in a bully free environment. BVB has four lovely individuals that brings hope and faith to a broken world where a lot of people struggle with everyday life. I am so happy you five all are in this lovely band together. Keep kicking ass.

Black Veil Brides is not just a band….In reality its the Saviour that keeps us going throughout the day and night when we have Lost It All cause…In The End…They are Nobody’s Hero… We are our own Hero’s….For that…. We Scream..We Shout…Cause.,,,We Are The Fallen Angels…cause we ……Never Give In, Never Back Down

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Journalists Note: These are all my written words. I don’t care if you share my written made products please give me credit with my twitter handle given in the copyright handle below. Please don’t steal from me or you get no potatoes and a ban notice slip from my potatoland(lol). Thank you for reading my written work it means a lot to me. Have a nice and lovely Sunday.

Written by: Mariah Hanna

Copyright @PotatoBVBQueen 9/29/2013

What is it like living with debilitating headache disorders?

People tend to ask me everyday what is it like to live with pain. Pain. Its a simple four letter word which brings an apocalyptic destruction to this Earth with drug abuse which I am guilty of, deception, and tears families apart. Without getting too detailed with how society got so messed up in the first place. Those were my perceptions on why this world is going to hell in hay basket. LOL.

I did admit that I had a drug addiction. I was taking cocktails after special remedies of Ibuprofen, Acetaminophen, Tylenol, Headache Relief, and over the counter pain reliever. I took those meds for 3 plus years not knowing the harm it was causing me. I couldn’t help myself because I was in chronic pain all the time. So I HAD to self medicate myself. Which led to one of the major factors as why I have permanent headaches for the rest of my life. I would like to say I am 8 months clean for the record. It hasn’t been easy. But I have been surprising myself day by day.  

I would like to describe in detail what disorders I have. I have three headache conditions. I have two stomach and GI disorders. I have one female disorder. Among other minor disorders.

I have had Attention Deficit Disorder all my life. I have had to take medications with it. There was one medication that fucked up my sleeping schedule till this day. Its called Concerta. Its a 24/7 365 stimulant. That keeps the brain active. So when the fucking kid needs to sleep their minds are still awake at night because of the fucking drug was a 24 hour fucking stimulant. Kids aren’t programed to have this such medication in their systems. I rebelled against taking my ADD medication due to the reason I wanted my precious sleep at night and I wasn’t getting any. Parents need to realize that their are natural remedies out there for their children. I chose to drink a little coffee to get the natural alert feeling and I did my school work fine. Parents YOU don’t have to give you kids a SHIT LOAD of coffee to the point they become tweakers. 8 oz cup of coffee should last a kid throughout the day but please be sure to give them brain foods such as oatmeal and breakfast in the morning. THAT is my take on ADD and the fuck ups in the world of that one.

I have Gastroesophageal Reflux disease and Irritable Bowel Syndrome. These syndromes fuck up everything I eat and drink. I of course eat healthy and eat whole foods. Fruits and vegetables especially the POTATO are my favorites. I love eating healthy. I DON’T believe in diets. I go by what my body wants me to do. I stay away from spicy foods. If I do eat spicy foods I usually drink water. Water is the key to life here. Love water. Water loves you. Eat healthy proteins and all that good stuff. Find healthy recipes on google to make. 🙂 I also take meds for these disorders if I haven’t taken the Prevacid I would be fucked. The prevacid helps balance my acid in my stomach. I have too much acid in my stomach that is being produced.

My female problem disorder I have is Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. This basically gives me sideburns like a man and I produce a little too much man testosterone in my hormones. I also have very extreme periods. Its like a huge murder scene but someone killed a cat on the way its that bad. Its so bad sometimes I lay on the couch in a fetal position. I take medication for this its called metformin. Enough of that awkward shit.

Now on to the biggies. Why I woke up to be a normal teenager one day in November of 2009 and the next day in November of 2009 to the worlds most excruciating headache words can’t even describe. I baffled doctors so bad that one ER doctor wrote in my doctor notes “I am just their to get pain meds, that I drug addict, It was all in my head, and I was hypochondriac.” I have battle with neurologists that I have them tell me “ I have nothing more to do for you. You need to choose  a new doctor.” The physical, mental, and emotional pain I go through with these severe headaches is very astounding.

What are these three disorders I have. Well for starters I have Chronic Migraine Daily Syndrome, Spontaneous Intracranial Hypotension(My rare disorder), and Fibromyalgia of the brain and throughout my body.

What CMDS means if you have 15 or more chronic headache days a month you have that syndrome. What SIH means is I had leak somewhere in my spinal column or in my nasal intracranial passage that slowly dripped out spinal fluid. When I lay down the pain is dormant at a horizontal state but when I stand in a vertical state the increased pressure goes into my brain cause an excruciating headache. I also have tiny veins throughout my body which provided a viable clue to the rare syndrome. THIS can be life threatening if I don’t take precautions and take care of health properly and get MRI’s, Cat Scans, etc once in awhile to keep everything in check. Yes one can get Fibromyalgia in their brain. Which means all my nerves in my brain are over stimulated and need to be balanced out with medications and severe pain blockers.  

 

What is it like living with these debilitating headache disorders? one word. HELL. Hell is the best way to describe this pain I live in. I ask for help from the right outlets only to get turned down, get called a drug addict(In their standards meth, cocaine, etc. which I NEVER touched in my life), and get called a mental insane person.

A day in the life of my headaches. I wake up and take my morning medication. I try to do as much housework as I can. I get so dizzy and sick when I do such activities such as mopping, doing the dishes, etc. It’s disheartening when an average person can get household chores done in 1-2 hours it takes me all day cause if I over do something. I will blackout or faint.

I can’t go out and enjoy a social life because of them. I had to put college on hold because of them. I can’t get a full time job cause I am considered disabled. I have to have odd ball cleaning jobs for income. Its just irritating as hell. Hell is a good way to put it all. LOL.  

I take a whole glob of meds for these. I won’t even begin to list them. Its just frustrating to live with pain day in and day out. I have want to commit suicide three times because of the pain. But I know I have a purpose on this planet and I need to see where this road to my legacy leads me. Cause I will never give in, and never back down. Its very eye opening that my rare disorder only happens in 1 in 50,000 births and their is only 60 something case reported including mine in the whole world. I can tell you this. Its very eye opening.

I don’t take my life grant anymore. I enjoy all the small things. I appreciate everyone that has come into my life. I am forever grateful and thankful for everything. It means a lot.

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Mariahs ending praises: Don’t let the world come crashing on to you. YOU have the keys to control your life. YOU are worth it in the end. YOU are amazing. No matter what you go through in life always smile, keep a level head, stay positive, stay strong, and always remember someone else out their has it way worse than you. I only wish YOU the reader reading this the best in life to whatever it is you want to do in life. Take your dreams and achieve them. Make them happen. Actions speak louder than words. YOU are in control.  

NEVER GIVE IN, NEVER BACK DOWN-Black Veil Brides

Always know if you need to speak to me my twitter handle is @PotatoBVBQueen if you just need to talk.

 

All rights and credits of the quote “Never give in, Never back down.” all go to Black Veil Brides in their inspirational song on We Stitch These Wounds “Never Give In” written by: Andy Biersack, Jake Pitts, Ashley Purdy, Jeremy Ferguson, and Sandra Alvarenga.

Copyright to @PotatoBVBQueen words If you steal my hard work and handwritten material no potatoes for you.

Black Veil Brides: We Scream. We Shout. We Are The Fallen Angels.

Good morning or night BVB army the following is meant for you:

Take Joy in who you are…. We know are wings are flawed…. are the words imprinted in “Fallen Angles” a song in one of its own by Black Veil Brides.  With those powerhouse lyrics. Fans around the world have connected with Black Veil Brides deeply. In my freelance article I will go on to further explain how fans show Black Veil Brides their love through music covers, artwork, and writings. 

Black Veil Brides has helped thousands of fans that I have previously mentioned in my article and review piece. They have helped those thousands of fans through meet and greets, music, online support when they can, and being their in spiritual. I have had the opportunity and honor to talk to a hundred of these amazing souled people through social media who have been inspired and changed forever by Black Veil Brides themselves and through their powerhouse music.

Black Veil Brides has helped save many lives as well as mine( January 27th). They have helped people with major depression, cutting and or self harm, suicide attempts, and other daily major life struggles people may face. Andy Biersack’s main mission for Black Veil Brides was to make a sense of community/family for “The Outcasts” the people who are going though the listed above issues/more and the daily dredge’s of daily life. To help guide them to follow their dreams and that we ARE worth it “At the end of the day.” no matter what. Each member of BVB has each individual inspirational quotes for their fans. It is rare to have a full band have a mass of inspiration and wanting their fans to succeed as well. It warms my heart everyday knowing that I have a sense of a “Home” in the BVB army cause of the love and support each individual band member gives. In my eyes, I have found my second family. 

I have noticed with in the BVB army/family the passed 6 plus months I have been in the fanbase is that we love and support each other in a time of need. I have gotten so much support and love within the passed 6 plus months when my sickness has gotten me down or I just feel down. This fanbase is the dream team of fanbases. Even though we have our faults at times. We really pull through and outshine when it comes to supporting BVB related events and voting for awards. 

I have seen numerous Youtube videos of kids doing phenomenal vocal, guitar, bass, and drum covers of Black Veil Brides songs. All of you are truly insanely talented. If you are one of those people who has done a cover and is reading this. Remember not to give up and keep going. Even if someone tells you what your doing is wrong. This even goes to you all who do paintings and drawings of BVB and writings/literature inspired by BVB. “Never Give In, Never Back Down.” YOU all are talented. Each and everyone of you. I was told all my life that I was never going amount to anything but I am going to prove people wrong by following my wildest dream of becoming a rock and roll journalist/interviewer. I plan on going back to school next year. So my fingers are crossed on that. 

What has Black Veil Brides done deeply to connect with their fans? Just about anything you can imagine. The stories fans have told via the internet about their meetings with BVB touches my heart. How extremely nice BVB is to their fans is one for the books. I would say this like winning the lottery in winning a great band that understands us all and an army that backs and loves each other in the time of need. 

Black Veil Brides will always and forever be one of those great bands of our generation that will carry on a “Legacy” of showing compassion, gratitude, hard work, determination, and any other amazing word you can call these four distinguished young men: Andy, Jinxx, Jake, CC, and “Former”.  I hope Andy’s dream of Black Veil Brides “Becoming the worlds biggest band” happens. 

In my eyes, Black Veil Brides will always have a special place in my heart. They mean the world to me. I don’t know what I would do without them. They deserve everything in the world. They deserve recognition and standing ovations at award shows not “Hate”. I don’t get why they receive so much hate. I just don’t. They deserve so much love and respect for all they do for people around the world. I feel sorry for people who hate them. They are missing out on something special. That is for sure. 

I hope one day Black Veil Brides does rule the world and puts the magical “Fuck You, Motherfucker.” in a positive fashion for all their lovely BVB army. I love the fact that this band accepts us for who we all are. Whether it be sexual orientation, weirdness, the way we dress, the way we look, and etc. I love it how we in the BVB army do the same for all the members of BVB and their crew. 

Black Veil Brides has not only saved my life from me almost committing suicide on January 27th. They have also helped me realized my life career and my person. If it weren’t for them. I don’t know where the heck I would be right now. Be lost. Really lost. 

I love it when I watch Youtube live videos of Black Veil Brides shows and how they all connect with their fans on stage. Its an experience that I will get to experience on October 3rd in Spokane, WA. My first ever BVB show. I am so internally/externally excited about it that I can throw a billion gagilion VICTORY POTATOES parties. 

In all and all, Black Veil Brides is one of those rare bands on this earth that everyone should cherish and love instead of hating upon. They care so much about their fans that is shows through their music. They even wrote “Saviour” for all of us on their sophomore album “Set The World On Fire” if that doesn’t show love and dedication for their fans then I declare the person who doesn’t see it as “Blind”. Their music saves lives everyday like people eat their potatoes. I only hope that they get bigger and show the world who’s boss. I only wish them the best in their lives, health, and well being. 

Black Veil Brides is one of those bands people love to hate. I understand people hating them. By all means hate on them. That is YOUR prerogative. I respect other peoples opinions as people should do mine. But I would like to mention a few things. NEVER allow your opinion BVB hater reading this to A) Cross the line and B)Make death threats against the band and or tell them to kill themselves. You will be reported by me and other caring BVB members. I know we don’t give a fuck. But really threatening death against another person for no reason at all is VERY fucked up. Oh while I am at this. QUIT CALLING THEM EMO-FAGS AND FAGGOTS. I view it as very asinine. YOU are throwing the LBGT community under the bus. Bullying is unacceptable period. So if you want to “Hate” hate in an acceptable manner. I will respect you. Please and thank you. 

Have a good one BVB army. I hope you are well where ever you hail from. I am doing well in Idaho aka Potatoland. YOU all mean the world to me. I only wish you all the best. Many Potato vibes. Have a many potatoes on me. THIS piece was made for ALL of you and the magnificent Black Veil Brides. 

NEVER GIVE IN…..NEVER BACK DOWN……NEVER GIVE IN WHEN THE FIRE RISES………BVB ARMY ALL FOR ONE AND ONE FOR ALL. BLACK VEIL BRIDES ARE OUR SAVIOURS……FOREVER AND ALWAYS….RISE UP AND CELEBRATE YOUR LIFE

 

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Freelance rock and roll journalism piece written by: Mariah Hanna 

“These Are MY words if you steal my words. NO Potatoes for you.” 

 

Black Veil Brides: The Sound of a Nation!!!!

Never give in…Never back down….Never give in when the fire rises. I would like to address recently that I apologized to Black Veil Brides for being a Black Veil Brides hater. Not many people have the balls to do that. They deserved it. I am so happy that I got their approval and acceptance of the apology. But anyways, I would like to address my recent researching of how biased rock/metal media sites take Black Veil Brides and the hate they get on their.

It just appalls me that people would and even professional journalists would degrade a band that has helped thousands of people throughout the world. Its just insane and appalling. How they take the most stupid things and make a big deal out them. Just recently all the metal/rock media was having a field day cause Black Veil Brides got caught using hollowed out cabs and the use of scrims. ALL bands use this technique. Even journalist’s find a way to show their “Hate” through bogus articles and to get more traffic to their sites. Its beyond insane to me. Oh and all the trolls flock to the sites and have a field day for themselves cause someone agrees with them. People do you have things to do. Like mow your lawns. Take care of your housework. Daily domestic chores. Its just appalling to me. I just don’t get why Black Veil Brides get the amount of hate they get. I know I used to hate them. But I kept my opinions to myself. But the outpouring of hate they get is just over the top insane.

I have been in the BVB army for 6 months now. I can’t believe the amount of love, respect, and devotion Black Veil Brides has for their army and fans alike. I have read countless Tumblr, Facebook, twitter messages, and blog pieces from BVB army members about how Black Veil Brides has helped them through a tough time whether it be from preventing them to commit suicide, self harm, and other negative acts. It brightens my heart to know that these four fine men who are normal walks of life like you the reader and I has helped that fan so deeply. Its very phenomenal and amazing what Black Veil Brides does.

Many members in the BVB army has showed their love and devotion of the band through beautiful art pieces for years. Even though I have been in the BVB army for six months now. I have researched the countless artwork these amazing people do. All the hours and hard work they put in doing their artwork pieces. Some of the pieces are so realistic its so unreal.

Black Veil Brides has done things no other band has ever did. They have done a film about their CD Wretched and Divine: The Story Of The Wild Ones called Legion Of The Black. I previously did a review of it a few weeks ago and still am amazed on how out of the box Black Veil Brides is with their music. They work so hard to put their music out their. Its one hundred percent themselves and their work. They write and play music based on influences and the years of practice they have under their belts. Jinxx is classical trained at playing the piano and violin. Jinxx and Jake Pitts guitar chemistry is one unique riff monster in itself. Their ain’t nothing that can reach or match what Jinxx and Jake’s writes and plays on the guitar. Along with CC’s “Take it to the next level” drumming beats. Andy’s guttural screams and his angel singing voice. I would like to say that he is one amazing singer. I have heard a lot singers in my time and he is up in the ranks with legends. I also love the fact that they take part in gang style vocals and how well its done.

Black Veil Brides is one unique band. Want to know why. Here are the reasons. Black Veil Brides lyrical standouts are off the charts and are through the roof. When Andy and or the band writes lyrics. Its pure liquid gold. Every ounce of lyrics they write is inspirational, moving, empowering, fun, educational, healing, helpful, and can save peoples lives. Black Veil Brides is a dream team of 4 normal dudes who came from ordinary backgrounds growing up from being bullied at school to just normal average daily dredge’s of life. Black Veil Brides basically in the BVB army’s eyes are “Super Heros” and are deemed their saviours. They are personally mine too. I don’t know how, what, or even I could live my life without Black Veil Brides now. So glad I apologized as a Black Veil Brides hater and I put the Black Veil Brides hater to death on January 27th of this year.

Black Veil Brides have yet to do even more magical things yet. I look forward to the future endeavors of the band. I honestly get goosebumps to even think about. Black Veil Brides and their famous BVB army will grow even bigger and bigger. I hope someday they do become “The Biggest Band in the World.” With each of their 4 talents there is no telling what their “Take It To The Next Level” move would be.

Black Veil Brides has helped thousands and thousands of people all around the world with their inspiring messages and powerhouse lyrics. I only hope they continue to save more lives in present and the future. BVB means the world to each and everyone of the BVB army members.

The amount of respect and love they give to their fans online, face-to-face, and in general is one for the books. They connect with their fans each and ever day. Its insane. I never seen a band so active with their fan base in my life. Its truly heartwarming to know that they truly give a shit about us as a whole. Its like winning the band to fan base lottery.

The charity work they do for all sorts of charities is awe inspiring. Andy, CC, Jinxx, Jake, and “Former” are 4 amazing people. It just pisses me off that people take them the wrong way based on first impressions. I hate that these 4 amazing individuals get so much hate and flack for just being themselves. When I see them post a charity link on the internet and if a fan helps promote the fund. I read the comments that other people make its truly sickening and sad. How people have to be so jealous of other people to degrade them like that. These four amazing men give a shit and give back to the community. I just don’t understand all this hate they get.

I see pictures of BVB and fans on the internet of fans meeting them. Some of the pictures are so beautiful and amazing that I cry happy tears for that person. When I read stories of people meeting them or just how BVB saved their life and so forth its amazing to read blog pieces and Tumblr posts like that everyday. I truly cherish reading all the BVB army’s stories. All the artwork floors me.

Black Veil Brides has inspired me to become a rock and roll journalist. I want to become my own rock star doing reviews and article pieces like the one you are just currently reading. P.S. Thank you for taking the time out your busy lives and to read my piece about Black Veil Brides. I only do hope and wish the best for each and everyone of them. I just can’t believe that a band was the key in my finding my person. Falling in love with Black Veil Brides has changed me life completely for the better.

In conclusion, I only hope to one day sit down when I am well educated in interviewing bands and the ethics behind it. To only one day interview Black Veil Brides. Its one of my interviewing bucket list items to do in my life. Black Veil Brides isn’t just a band we are family meaning we are legion, for we are many. Hoping someday they get the recognition they deserve such as awards and standing ovations at award shows instead getting booed and hated upon. Black Veil Brides has helped thousands and thousands of their BVB army members throughout the world through their powerhouse lyrics and inspirational messages. Each and everyone of them have shown their god given musical talents through all three albums of theirs: We Stitch These Wounds, Set The World On Fire, and Wretched and Divine:The Story of The Wild Ones and their Rebels EP. I only wish to continue on being a huge fan of theirs. They mean the world to me as they do to each and everyone of the BVB army member’s. Its insane how one band can changed the whole world. I have no words to describe how amazing each of them are. I only wish the best for them. Best of wishes Black Veil Brides. We all love you.

WE ARE LEGION. FOR WE ARE MANY…..NEVER GIVE IN…NEVER BACK DOWN….. NEVER GIVE IN WHEN THE FIRE RISES… BLACK VEIL BRIDES WILL RULE AND CONQUER. BLACK VEIL BRIDES TILL THEE END. BVB FOREVER AND ALWAYS……………….

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Black Veil Brides article written by: Mariah Hanna(PotatoBVBQueen is my twitter handle) Date July 3rd, 2013

-These are my words. If you steal my hard work and my words. NO POTATOES FOR YOU.

P.S. My computer word software somehow changed cabs to amps in the second paragraph. Apologies for the mistake. All I can say is stupid technology now days.

Legion Of The Black: A Fan Film Review

We are the Revelation….. We are one.. I would like to open this review on a positive note as many positive notes will be made throughout this review. For weeks I planned on reviewing “Legion Of The Black” directed by: Patrick Fogarty. When I got the DVD I was going to watch it with no interruptions at all. I just got done watching it a few minutes ago. BY FAR thee most amazing sight my eyes have ever seen in a long time .

I would like to say congratulations to Andy, Christian, Jinxx, Jake, and “Former”. Plus to Alicia Vigil, Patrick Fogarty, William Control, Juliet Simms and many other people who made such a beautiful rock and roll musical film happen.

First I would like to comment on how well done the sound effects and background sound effects were well done. Plus Black Veil Brides on one hell of performance throughout the entire film. The sounds were at theater room quality in my tiny little earbuds. I HAVE NEVER had that experience before watching a DVD on my laptop. Everything was well done and well thought out. Sound was carefully planned out and casted thoroughly.

Second, the lighting and other effects throughout the film was just like a fourth of July firework finale every gosh dang second. My ADD was off the wall trying to keep up and stay focused throughout the film. It was just beautiful.

The short story Andy wrote for Wretched and Divine: Story of the Wild Ones that was portrayed in Legion of the Black was beyond phenomenal. Andy is one pure, intellectually genius that thinks outside of the box when it comes to writing music. I HAVE NEVER in my 21 years of being an avid music lover come across someone lyrically that powerful and then turn around write a short story for rock and roll musical film like this. Just amazing if you ask me. My mind is blown. YOU go Andy. I also want to pin point the musical counterparts that were written so well by Jinxx, Jake, “Former”, CC, and Andy. The musical counterparts were written so well. This concept album/film was thoroughly well musically thought out. The riffs, breakdowns, solos, bridges, choruses, and Jinxx’s classical music orchestrated music made for one insane album. I love how Jake and Jinxx feed off of each other riff wise. Their chemistry is sonically one huge shit kicker with Christian’s “CC Smash” or “Take it to the next level” killer drums beats. YOU GO ANDY, CC, JINXX, AND JAKE.

Third I would to say the cast throughout the film was just outstanding. I didn’t watch this and expect a crappy film. BVB they make turds turn into golden nuggets. Alicia Vigil’s aka Eve Black’s inner strength and courage throughout the film was inspiring. How her parents took her from being a manic for loving something so much that she lives and breathes that bands music everyday and they put her in mental institution for not accepting for who she is. But in today’s society this does really happen. I am very fortunate to have parents who grew up liking the same sort of musical tastes I do. But some kids out their aren’t fortunate and have strict parents who condemn their children for rebelling against their families beliefs and traditions. I have only seen this for many years on the internet kids take to music as their psychologist cause they can’t talk to their parents cause they are the reason to their problems. People aren’t perfect. But its up to the person on what path they choose in life. As said in LOTB “You can live your life in heaven or create your hell.” You either live your life in positive manner or negative manner its up too you as the reader of the review.

Fourth is my own take on this miraculous musical film. No words can ever describe how amazing this music film is. Black Veil Brides has done NO ever band has done before. Made a film out of their CD. I will continue to support these five multi-talented men. They have gone and did something out of the box. I love the film so much the film will never get old with me.

Fifth, Juliet Simms and Willam Controls guests appearances were very phenomenal and well done. I was very shocked at their performance and their charisma throughout Legion Of The Black. Their vibe to the film was phenomenal.

Sixth, The portrayal of F.E.A.R and the Rebels their epic journey and battle for a united kingdom had me speechless throughout the musical film. It was amazing out cry from both sides to see the struggle enfold and end in a epic uprising battle.

All in All, Black Veil Brides will become the biggest band in the world someday and this musical film proves it all. I just don’t get why these five amazing men get the hate they do. Its just absurd. Of all the thousands of fans they have helped through the years this band is surely doing everything right in the books. I am so happy to have become a fan of Black Veil Brides. They mean the world to me as they mean the world to each and everyone of you BVB army members.

With the releasing of The Ultimate Edition of Wretched and Divine:Story of The Wild Ones yesterday and many other Black Veil Brides events happening throughout the week. This week and every week is dedicated to Black Veil Brides. Everyone have an awesome International BVB on June 17th. I plan on doing something epic on that day. Stay tuned.

BLACK VEIL BRIDES WILL DOMINATE THIS EARTH. WE ARE THE REVELATION, WE ARE ONE….NEVER GIVE IN WHEN THE FIRE RISES….LONG LIVE THE BLACK VEIL BRIDES.

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These are my thoughts on the Legion of the Black a film on Wretched and Divine: The Story of the wild ones a concept done by rock and roll band from Hollywood, CA Black Veil Brides. This is must see film for any fan of theirs, musical film enthusiasts, non opened minded BVB fans, and people in all walks of life in general.

Thank you for reading my review. Greetings from Idaho.

Mariah Hanna (The Potato BVB Queen)

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My whole life I have battled medical issues: but I overcame every obstacle.

Hi, my name is Mariah. I have gone through so many medical issues through out my life. When I was young I gotten sick more than the average kids while growing up. I suffered and overcame Attention Deficit Disorder. I took medication for it till I was a sophomore in high school. I didn’t like the side effects what the medications gave me. One in particular gave me sleep insomnia and screwed up my sleep clock schedule. That medication is called Concerta. I don’t condone parents of kids who have ADD or ADHD to use medications first to solve the problem. Since kids of young ages have rapidly growing bodies and to have this chemical in their bodies is just wrong. I would seek different ways to cope with the ADD or ADHD. Here’s how I have managed to stay off the medication 10 years. Its hard for one to stay on task. Especially if you have ADD or ADHD. Ones brain is constantly active 24/7; 365. I have found that coffee and tea was a natural stimulant to keep one focused with ADD and ADHD. Sitting in front of the classroom was a great way to stay focused with what was going on the white board and what the teacher or college professor was doing. I find that in daily life people can slack off and things. I have this get everything important done when your an adult before play. If you have this mindset. You will be set to be successful in life. 

I have had female problems throughout my life. I just learn to deal with them. I was diagnosed with Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome last year after years of suffering horrible periods and cramps. I tried everything for them exercise and everything in the book but I finally consulted my doctor about it. If you want to know this personal story contact me on here or via on twitter @PotatoBVBQueen. I am open about my medical things but some of it to a certain extent. 

I also was bullied too thought out my life. With my learning disabilities and other outstanding disabilities. I have learned to stick up for myself. Bullying is not okay. I hope one day it is abolished. I got called several names. To many to mention here. I will make a post later on about my bullying story. But anyways, on too my biggest medical obstacle I have ever overcame and still am struggling till this day. 

I was enjoying my last year of high school the best I could. I was overjoyed that I made it to my senior year of high school cause the doctors told me that I would never receive a high school diploma or go to college. I DID BOTH. Not to mention I got accepted into my nursing program. With being diagnosed with ADD. Until one day in November of 2009 changed my life forever. I was seemingly ordinarily teenager like everyone else listening to music like Black Veil Brides, Avenged Sevenfold, Atreyu, etc. Doing ordinary teenage stuff until that day came I got excruciating headaches. The pain is almost undescribable. Some days I just want to sleep the whole day through or just lay in my famous awkward position that semi helps. lol. But as the title of this blog aptly puts I overcome every obstacle. The pain in my head hurts so bad that I sometimes pass out or black out from intense pressure that has built in my head. I have gone to 10 Neurologists and one Neurosurgeon. I have been admitted 12 times in the hospital for my severe headaches. Some of the doctors think its “All in my head” and I am simply their to get pain killers cause they think I am pain killer addict when simply I am not. I go their for answers but simply get turned down cause I am an unsolved mystery. Until I met my one neurologist. Dr. Dunn. He has helped me tremendously and has gotten me on a path to probably solving or helping cure some of my headaches. 

To everyone that is reading this. I have rare headache syndrome called Spontaneous Intracranial Hypotension. 60 people in the world have this rare syndrome. 1 in 50,000 births have this rare disease. Its potentially life threatening. I got diagnosed with this last year as well. It forever changed my life March of 2011 of months of going through hell with the doctors and the headaches weren’t getting any better. But I stayed positive and strong throughout the whole thing. Music, family, and friends helped through that difficult time in my life. 

I had to get a spinal tap with this as well. Plus several CAT SCAN’s and MRI’s. Luckily one of the MRI’s should my rare syndrome. I was born with tiny veins through out my body. It is extremely difficult to retrieve blood from me for tests. 

Plus with my headaches I have had other medical issues as well that has been associated with my severe headaches. I have severe Gastro-intestinal issues, GERD( Gastro-Esophageal Reflux Disease),  and feet pain issues which is called Athromylagia. 

The doctor said I have microscopic CSF( Cerebrospinal Leak) in my head somewhere since their is no one in my spinal column. I had to take a test and my left nostril was negative and my right nostril was positive for the leak. 

I have to be knocked out for my next test before I have brain surgery to fix the leak. The ENT has to pack my nostrils and pour contrast up their to see if they can find the leak that way if they do. Then they will set my brain surgery. I am fully confident that the doctors are going to help cure some of my headache pain. I am very strong and positive about everything. 

I also have taken several medications for my severe headaches but I have become immune to them that I have just resorted to suffering with the pain. Pain medication just coat the issue. Plus one can get addict. So I have forced myself to cope and deal with all these issues with out any pain medication what so ever. I would like to say my headaches are like a hangover but without the alcohol involved. 

I also was diagnosed with Chronic Migraine Daily Syndrome. If I have to life with a life long headache for the rest of my life, I sure as hell need to make it great, positive, awesome, amazing, and phenomenal experience. Cause what is life with a self wallowing pity party. With my headaches it has inspired me and also helped me find what I want to do with my life in the future. 

I want to become a disabilities psychotherapist for the elderly and children of all ages. My life’s mission is to help others and make others feel good about themselves. If you are reading this you are amazing. Know someone out their loves you for who you are. 

I also want to add that the pain that I have gone through for 2 plus years has gave me some depression. I have had my bouts with suicidal thoughts but I have overcame them.

I am so glad that I have gotten this all blogged out. If you have read this blog. Thank you for doing so. I plan on doing great things in the future with all this. But right now I am currently on a Speed Bump in my life. Everyone has them. This won’t be last one neither.

I live by the saying “Shit Happens” shit does happen for reason. Either in a funny way or a bad way. I say it numerous times a day. Plus my other famous saying “You get shit in one hand and roses and tulips in the other” lol.

On my end note. I want everyone that has read this think to themselves. Be grateful for what you have in your life. Cause someone else out their has it worse than you. Don’t take shit from no body. You all are amazing. Know that somewhere out their someone loves you. Some way somehow we are all connected together by common roots and grounds. Life has brought me beautiful things to see in life. I don’t take nothing for grant.

I wish all of you the best in health, life, and endeavors. Vibes from Potatoland. Know that YOU are worth it and best of wishes. 

With lots of love, 

Mariah L, Hanna 8/11/2012 *Revised 2/9/2017 

Words by Mariah L, Hanna: If you steal from me I will haunt you down and make you give my words back and potatoes.