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Sometimes we all fall down: But its up to us and ourselves to pick ourselves up from the ashes

I have had the toughest three months with my medical issues. Being extreme stomach pains and intensified headaches. Which has halted my writing altogether as the extreme pain didn’t allow me to focus and write properly. I was then put on a new stomach pain reliving medication, hooray right. NOT. Its been hell. I am in hell with it. It relieves my pain by a smudge but the side effects has made me into a completely zombie and very weak at times. Plus I don’t have much of an appetite anymore. Plus I have been dealing with wisdom teeth. Plus the horrible news is I should be getting my gallbladder removed but can’t cause my immune system is compromised and I am ill 24/7 365. Plus my body is very weak no matter how healthy I try to get it to a point it to be in. I am having surgery on Thursday to get a Laparascopy to check on everything. I am strong and things. But am scared a little on what they will find out. But I will “Never give in, Never back down”-BVB. I know I am strong and I will pull through.

I haven’t been writing at all because of my medical issues and the death of my grandpa. The death of my grandpa was REALLY hard on my cause I had to see my grandpa on his last days slowly die on his death bed. It was the toughest shit I ever had to see in my 22 years of life. My grandpa was my rock and inspiration to do things such as what your reading. He means the world to me. He is WWII veteran, fought for my country, and worked as a citizen for his country with numerous mill, etc jobs to raise his family. He took me in as his own even though I am not blood related to him. I thanked him for all he has given to me before dementia took his life and memory. But these last few months have been tough on me writing wise cause I couldn’t find my inspiration to write again. It was lost cause of the depression and deep hole I was in from my grandpa dying and my medical issues giving me hell. But Its all because of band named, Black Veil Brides that has not only once but twice resurrected my love and passion for my writing again from the “Ashes”. I am deeply and utterly in love with their message and who they represent themselves as a band.

Andy said something during the CreativeLive class he had guest spoke for Kevin Lyman that helped me revamp my love entirely for writing. He said along the lines that you need to believe in yourself, keep working mentally everyday on your passion, don’t give in to the people who don’t believe your passion, surround yourself with people who DO believe in your passion, most importantly believe in yourself again. If you want to catch what he said because I don’t want to spoil the magic of this positive interpersonal advice at 26:58-29:15. Reason why I don’t want to spoil it cause of the magic it will give to people who are struggling like I was with my writing and getting my low lit flame in my heart raging again for writing. Watch the video right here:

I am so thankful, appreciative, grateful, and honored to have a band like Black Veil Brides to come into my life in such a time that I needed to be told the most that “I am going to be okay” “YOU are amazing” even though they do it indirectly. The passion and love they have for their fans makes me honored and grateful that I am meeting them in 33 days and seeing them live. People often forget to realize that behind the band are human beings. These human beings have feelings. That to me alone makes what I am going to do in 33 all to special. I love BVB a lot. I wish them good luck in their career in Black Veil Brides. In all in all, BVB deserves all the great things in life such as awards, etc. I only hope that they can get treated better in the media outlets that are biased towards them and by the public eye. But slowly it starts. If they can convert one hardcore disbeliever(me) into a huge supporter and huge fan of theirs. Then they are doing everything right as a band. I have faith they are going to kick some donkey with #BVB4. So LONG LIVE BLACK VEIL BRIDES. NEVER GIVE IN. NEVER BACK DOWN. Even when live has you down in the darkest of moments always know people have your back no matter what. I am blessed to tater tots to have all this love and support. Thank you. You have no idea.

And Andy; you have no idea how much your advice means to me. It resonated with me deeply that I am writing again withing the 72 hours i first watched that video. You are an incredibly intelligent human being. I am so glad to have you as a new inspiration to look up to in my life cause your a man of legend(Say the same to your band brothers). I hope some day you can get praised for your work and honored instead of heckled and biased by media critics for BVB and your other “Passion Project”. I love you lots. You have completely changed my life on how I look at things and how learn now. I am happy that I named my cat after you. Loki Andy is my lovely toilet buddy kitty(He is a joy to have in my life). I hope BVB can “Become the biggest band in the world someday” or at least rule the world. Cause right now I think its just beginning. I am glad to be a fan of yours now(that is all that matters now). You deserve what I have to say to you in 33 days face to face vis-a-vis. BVB more than deserve it.

Thank you for reading this. It means a lot. I hope I can get back to my mojo again. I am glad I am back at to writing. It feels good. To all my fans. I love you so much. Thank you for sticking with me through thick and thin. Plus understanding. So thank you. I love you all very much. NEVER give in. No matter what shit and life brings you. Go forth and conquer.

-Mariah L. Hanna @PotatoBVBQueen 10/6/14 *Check About Page

P.S. EAT ALL THE TATERS TO KICK HEART DISEASE IN THE DONKEY REAR. 😉 ❤

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Legion of the black: If we stand together, we will be unbroken pt. 2(My side of the coin)

I write this as a piece in celebration of International Black Veil Brides day in celebration of the 5th anniversary of “Knives and Pens”. As I reminisce about what Black Veil Brides means to me. I thought I would make this as my side of the coin sort of speak. i hope to celebrate many more years as a BVB fan. BVB has traveled all over the world and helped thousands and thousands of fans over the world. I am just one of those fans sort of speak giving positive feedback to a band that lacks some professional written articles(I love you all who are professional writers who give positive neutral feedback to BVB, give yourself a plate of cheesy tot’s) about them. Here are my thoughts, attributes, and connotations of the first article’s poll questions as I give them self a spin of my own. Enjoy reading my article that was mere of a freelancer. -Mariah L. Hanna 

Black Veil Brides has been a controversial band over the past 5 plus years since “Knives and Pens” made its way through the air waves and through the YouTube stratosphere. Black Veil Brides has been widely known for there rock n roll antics and “I don’t give a fuck nature” Black Veil Brides is consisted of 5 main characters the prophet, mystic, mourner, destroyer, and deviant. These characters being known as Andy Biersack, Jinxx, Jake Pitts, Christian “CC” Coma, and Ashley Purdy.

I spent two years on the other side of the fence hating what Black Veil Brides pride themselves of. That is self-worth, inner strength, courage, empowerment, and everything that Black Veil Brides inspires their loyal fans of being. I didn’t know at the time that change was going to happen. But low and behold it did change happened for a reason. A reason a greater being can only know. Something shifted inside me to a degree that I went on the other side of the fence forever. I bid farewell and riddance to the person I was and became a greater person today. Never thought in a million years I would become a BVB fan but here I am a better person because of them.

You see, people make out Black Veil Brides as villains, evil people, assholes, asses, and every negatory word that has been thrown at them face to face or via social media. People cast them out to be evil demon worshipers or devil worshipers that sacrifice goats to Satan( Andy: “I think I am going to sacrifice some goats today on stage to Satan!”: Said by him never hmm maybe but more of mere comical reference. Lol.) As I said before; LISTEN TO BLACK VEIL BRIDES AND HAIL SATAN!. BVB are nothing more than inspirational people inside and out. They help people find who they are as people. Whether it be an artist, musician, writer, etc. People take their “Image” and think one thing without listening to their music or even doing simple research on them.

Why I hated them? I was led by mere biased assholes in the media who made me believe that Black Veil Brides were assholes which made me think otherwise of them. I did NOT go and make a hate page against them or go to their personal social media accounts and tell them to “Kill themselves” or “You should go die faggot, your music is shitty” I went about my day and didn’t think nothing of it. Which makes me 00.001% rarity of former BVB haters cause I GAVE their music a shot. I didn’t listen to just one song. I listened to 4 songs before making a decision. They just didn’t get me at that time. I am proud to being doing what I am going to do possible on November 8th and that is to apologize to them face to face. I plan on getting VIP and apologize to all 5 of them not only for me but for all the shit they get and thanking them for helping me through some shitty times and plus being their for the rest of the BVB army.

If it were not for a public service like Black Veil Brides and other bands with similar messages through their music. A lot of people would not be here today. I know “Music saves lives” gets glorified and glamorize to a point were its annoying and can become suffocating for a musician to go through. Hence the lyrics to “Nobody’s Hero” but we all have to realize we all did this for ourselves. You can give some credit to the people who helped you along the way but its all you. 😉

I get back to why I hate Black Veil Brides in the past. I believed some biased asshole journalist’s who said “Black Veil Brides is your new band to hate” and that they are scum something inside of me told me that this wasn’t right but I disliked their music at the time but I didn’t hate their music. But I got sucked into some social media debaucheries that spewed hate about BVB I call it the “BVB hater black hole of doom”. So I have to classify myself as BVB hater but I was never one in the first place cause I was set out to be a huge fan in the first place.

I only thank one thing about being a past BVB hater that is my utter closeness I have with BVB and the BVB army/LOTB as a whole. I have never been this close with any band ever. I have been a fan of several bands for nearly a decade and the rest all my life of the music I was raised on. I have never been this close with a band before its crazy. I never felt so close to a band that within a year I have already got myself a small BVB merch collection of the things I have seen in stores of theirs.

What are my feelings and thoughts on Black Veil Brides? I love them. Rather than loathe them like I did. They each carry a special meaning to me personally. I am glad I converted cause this means the world to me to have so much support from people who care and love. I care so much about them it hurts. I love their fan base so much its astronomical. I wish I could give them each a thousand hugs and taters. I am in love with their message and the way the BVB army all supports each other. Its incredible . Everyone rallies around a member if they are in a crisis. I see the same exact thing in other fan bases but nothing at the BVB armies magnitude. None of their love and support could never be erased. Ever.

What does Black Veil Brides mean to me? They mean the world to me. I have never in my life had a band come into my life and impact my life in such a way as theirs did. They fought for their acceptance and love from me. They won it tenfold with lots of taters and gravy. The day that I officially became a fan and let their love inside my soul is something I can’t erase and I will never take for grant. When I surrendered it was the best day and worst day of my life cause I didn’t know I was on the path to my own slow recovery as a pain pill addict and in suicide remission. Bands like Black Veil Brides get torn to shit and pieces in the public eye because of FEAR. Instead they need to be praised for what they do for their fans like me. I am a year and 3 months clean because of a beautiful song of theirs called “Devils Choir” its a song about someone struggling with destroying themselves with addictions and other harmful things they do to themselves. I had a pain-killer addiction cause I have 3 permanent headache conditions for the rest of my life plus 7 minor to major medical conditions. It took all I had in me to break the addict. Its not fucking easy everyday but I make everyday my bitch. Never give in, Never back down is my new motto to live by. So if you’re a hater of BVB. Step back for a moment from the keyboard. You can still have your opinions about them but have in mind they helped thousands of people including me a former hater of them.

BVB mean the world to their fans and supporters. With the anticipation of BVB4 and upcoming tours. I would like to take the time to say that I am posting one MAJOR article maybe even TWO. One being a “Album Review of BVB4” and “Concert Review of November 8th”(I hope I get to go. I praying for healthy roads and nice weather) so stay tuned to my WordPress.

I hope you all celebrate “International Black Veil Brides Day” in style today. Rep BVB today in numbers today. Wear your merch and blast your music with pride today and everyday.

I end this article on a high note. I only wish my lovely readers the best in life in whatever endeavors they seek. Life is not easy. But always know that Black Veil Brides, you’re friends, family, and even colleagues will back you in whatever you do. Plus any other band you listen too as well. Just don’t believe what you read out their. Trust your heart and soul. Believe in yourself. Always eat your potatoes. Cause they kick heart disease right in the ass. But I digress and get back on topic. “Never give in, Never back down” and “Rise up and celebrate your life:” Cause you never know when your time card is up. Enjoy your one life the best you can. Make your dreams like your hero’s did come a reality and never stop being who you are. YOU are your own hero. Go forth and conquer.

Written by: Mariah L. Hanna Copyright @PotatoBVBQueen 6/17/14 *See About page for aestrick note

 

Legion Of The Black: If we stand together, We will be unbroken series

I asked for three plus weeks now via my twitter @PotatoBVBQueen my official twitter for everything I do. I have asked two poll questions to the BVB army these questions: What are your thoughts on Black Veil Brides? What dose Black Veil Brides mean to you? I want to give the whole BVB army a voice through my article as WE all made the Legion Of The Black known as the BVB army happen. I hope you the reader enjoy reading this positive attribution through my eyes and among others as I have done tumultuous research about Black Veil Brides about how positively and huge impact they have on their fans or non-fans around. I plan on doing this article as a part series as there is TOO MANY BVB stories to give voice to. Enjoy the time and effort I put into gathering testimony and the love these fans have for five dudes of the semi-norm known as Black Veil Brides- Mariah L.Hanna 

Black Veil Brides is a band that people have either come to known to love or hate them. I am a rarity to have experienced both of those feelings towards this band that has helped me in such a way that I found my dream career path that YOU are reading as of this second. I plan on getting some sort of journalism/business degree in the near future. As that is being said. I could only thank one band that has helped me find my path in the right direction and that is Black Veil Brides.

Black Veil Brides is a very controversial band. They get a ton of bullshit thrown at them through the press, social media, and even face to face social situations. I want to give rise to this band that they are NOT satanic, sadomasochistic, or anything else people label them as.

I would like to make a side note as this article was supposed to be released on May 3rd as a notion of the day I was “Risen from the ashes” and was lead to my career path and my talent in life. I was bullied and was a lost soul until I let BVB into my soul last year. That being said. Converting to BVBism was thee best decision of my life cause it not only bettered my life it also led me to my dream to start my legacy. I was incredibly ill with my severe health conditions that made me put this article on hold for a bit. I didn’t fret one second why I was sick to think of things for this article and what not. So I “Never gave in” and go well to the point were I am back now at the writing again. Thank you all for being so patient it means a lot. I love you all lots.

I digress back to the first article of this series I am doing. “Legion Of The Black: If we stand together, We will be Unbroken”. I want to give rise to the thousands or hundreds if I can many touching BVB stories that I come across and how BVB has affected them in positive manners and how they have helped them get through shit. I am happy to just convey these messages if I can to any band if they helped them out. BVB has made an imprint on my life so much that if I have for example my old feelings for them back I would never go back to being a hater EVER again. I promise on my potatoes on that. Haha I won’t ever have my old feelings for BVB anyways cause I love them so much I could eat mashed potatoes while having a few emotional tugs at the heart.

Black Veil Brides has helped millions, thousands, hundreds, and numerous amounts of people through their positive music, lyrics, and their bystander effect mentality for worldly issues such as bullying, self harm, etc. They are one of thee best known bands who have anti-positive messages for people dealing with shit from variety of things. The “Never give in, Never back down” motto to life is what BVB preaches everyday. Whether they are on tour or not. Many other bands have similar messages but I find BVB’s proactive messages pure and unified.

In fact, last year Black Veil Brides raised awareness through the Bully Project through selling “If We Stand Together, We Will Be Unbroken” t-shirts and tank tops to raise money for the charity. People find bands like Black Veil Brides satanic and every other misconception in the book people may have against them. People don’t know is that Black Veil Brides members are human. Just like you and I. YOU being the reader and I being the writer of this article. People treat them like they are some vicious poisonous animal in a cage when in reality they are sweethearts, kind natured, no ill thought, nice hearted, and loving soul dudes that care.

Black Veil Brides are a controversial band but with this article I want to focus more on the positive nature of this band versus the negatory they get for certain medias and critics.  I want to bring more justice to not only this band but to people’s minds who will judge bands like Black Veil Brides cause of their aesthetics nature and style. It angers me when people just judge people based of their looks or they haven’t even listened to the band. I for one gave BVB a CHANCE. I didn’t just listen to “Knives and Pens” I listened to a variety of their music before making a decision of becoming a fan or not. Unfortunately their music never clicked with me then until now. Which I am extremely thankful now. If it weren’t for them. You wouldn’t be reading what you are reading right this second. I thank them endlessly for “Rising me out of the ashes” and inspiring me to pick up my writing again. I feel whole again. All I had to do is believe in a band that I hated once. Just believing and caring about them makes me feel awesome. Its feels right being a BVB fan and army member. I love them very much. Each of them carries their own separate inspiration towards me. I have no words to describe it. I am glad that the BVB hater in me is gone forever. Glad I converted on January 27th, 2013. Best day of my life even though it was my worst day cause it was the start of something special. The day I was “Risen from the Ashes” Forever thankful for Black Veil Brides even Jake mentioned to me “I knew it was just a matter of time” for all BVB converters including me. It really mean’t something special to me.

Black Veil Brides has had so much shit thrown at them through out the years. I want to show the positive side of this band and what they harness for the world. They have a power ballads of anti-bullying, self-worth,  inspirational, moving, positive, and life improving messages through their music. BVB has done a great service throughout the years of getting younger generations into rock and roll and metal. I was told by people who this is a great public service but yet they get shit on. Why. There are tons of reasons why. Many situations of why people hate BVB. Nearly all of it is bullshit. I just want to focus more on the positive here in this article versus the bullshit BVB gets. ALL bands deserve that unless that band treats their fans like shit then they have every right to have bullshit slayed at them. But its bands like BVB that treat their fans like gold that get lots of shit for the way they look or the way their music sounds. I want to live in a world someday were people of the internet grow up and instead get jobs instead of being lazy keyboard warriors having no life.

So in this. I am going to shut up and give the BVB army the loyal members of the Legion Of The Black a voice through my article. I am going to give meaning to why I started this series aptly called “Legion Of The Black: If We Stand Together, We Will Be Unbroken”. I started it cause I want to not only give people of the BVB army a voice. I wanted to give them a voice because they are what made the community, family, and fan base happen. Everyone deserves a voice. I am a lady who believes in equality. I believe that once everyone’s voices gets heard. I can sleep better at night knowing I did a wonderful service to society. Music has joined us all together for eternity and forever we are bonded by what is known as “Legion Of The Black”.

Now for the lovely opinions I asked for. Thank you for reading this article series. There is going to be more as there are going to be more personal and inspirational stories and opinions about the Black Veil Brides. THIS means the world to me. Thank you to those who submitted opinions to me. It means a lot. -M.H.

BVB mean a heck of a lot to me to me: they’re such amazing guys and are dedicated in everything they do. Their messages they give across in their music is wonderful. They deserve great success.-@ghostlymystic

They’re getting kids into hard rock and metal, which is a huge public service @BloodGrin946


BVB necessarily didn’t save my life but they have helped me realize some things about myself that I should improve on. They helped me have a more positive look and things in general. They gave me hope and courage and opened mind. When I listen to them, I feel so empowered and strong. It’s a joy to listen to their music. I also think that they’re getting younger people into rock and hard rock which is good and showing them good music. They’re hard working, talented musicians, very humble, and grateful but they also don’t take bullshit people’s bullshit. They do their own thing and are amazing people-Mia

Black Veil Brides? That means saving in dark times and a laugh when needed @IcecubeInsanity

BVB are extremely important to me. They help me through hard times, make me happy, make me laugh, and I love them. I think BVB is an amazing band, and every member of the band is a great role model and very musically talented. @meganBVB123

BVB are my world and to me they are amazing and talented. They will always be my favorite band of “Brothers” I will not give up of give in because of them. They saved me from the bad depression I had and have helped me control it. @CourtPurdyBVB

I had a toxic mother that crashed me down and insinuated a deep insecure feeling in me. She left us 21 months ago I didn’t realize that my chains were finally broken at the moment. But all the bad feelings i had for years became a strange mixture of not understandable feelings. I was completely lost. I was scared cause I realized I was listening to my mind and wasn’t able to do it cause I have 2 sons to look after and there, thanks to one of my sons I heard Knives and Pens for the first time. I have asked Dimitri what was it. He explained to me who Andy, Jake, and Jinxx was. How difficult had been for them and I have been deeply touched about their lives. In a certain way it was similar to mine. I was surprised that my very popular against himself was so deeply touched by BVB. He introduced me to the BVB world and I finally realized that it was okay not to be perfect and I pretended to myself, well its will always will be difficult to me to try to accept myself as I am. BVB lyrics touch people deep inside. Doesn’t matter what problem you have: Alcohol, Drugs, depression. Adults and teens clearly understand each word in their own reading key and that is truly amazing. How many people can honestly talk to others telling the right word to make them feel better. To make them feel like there not alone. Because this is the way we feel after listening to Andy’s lyrics. BVB make hope us pull it through. @BVBpinafan

They are amazing and have saved so many lives, they’re made particularly mine way better in a lot of ways. I love and admire them and not only they are talented, they are the kindest people and treat their fans awesomely good.- @SofiiKlainer

@MandyJames1979 Told me she could write a whole essay on these guys. I feel her as I have written many articles on these fellas. Their are no amount of words to explain how and why BVB has affects us. BVB is very influential and positive band for all. Thank you Mandy for your input. It means a lot. 

BVB was my first band I ever really truly loved and if it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t be here @ImaBeLovingFML

Sitting at home and Rebel Love Song came onto Kerrang TV and it hit me. The Biggest jolt of electricity you could imagine shot through me. I couldn’t sit still and as soon as it was over I wanted it to come back on. I had never felt so alive. Little did I realize that was the moment the magical journey began. After discovering BVB had an album out that year. I went out and bought it that day after hearing Rebel Love Song. I set my sights on learning everything there was to know about this new found love, becoming a sponge for knowledge about BVB. I found Knives and Pens video via fanpop which got played repeatedly, then YouTube was getting frequented on a daily basis, the search bar getting the words Black Veil Brides hammered in there at every chance I got. After suffering the loss of my brother Mark in December 2010, which is one of the hardest I have ever had to go through, no matter how hard I tried nothing helped, even music wasn’t helping. So I floated about lost, alone, without my brother, my best friend the one who I was closest to the most and will forever miss with all my heart. Up until the day that I heard Rebel Love Song it was a struggle and unbearable, but you gave my hope, a sense belonging, make me stronger, make me confident, make me who I am today, and most of all make me the person I am today and be myself, you complete my world. The more I learn and read about Black Veil Brides the more I find myself falling more in love with the five magical individuals who saved me from losing sense of who I am becoming a shell, a doormat, lost, and alone. The message, lyrics, songs, and the many words of wisdom,  dedication, respect, and passion you give will forever give me the strength, passion, and confidence and so many more powerful attributes you have built up inside me. Black Veil Brides rose me from the metaphorical ashes, so thank you. – @BlackVeilAngels 

-Written by: Mariah L. Hanna 5/26/2014 Copyright@PotatoBVBQueen *See About Page

 

Devils Choir: A trials and tribulations of one BVB army member

“You’ve been running for so long, still breathing,
Hoping soon to find a song worth singing.
Every chapter of this note, they’re reading,
But you’re slowly losing hope on bleeding.

I’ll carry you, my darkest desire.
When life sings to you through devil’s choirs.
F.E.A.R. won’t steal what burns in you,
I’ll carry you away from the fire.

My desire, devil’s choirs
My desire, devil’s choirs

Raise another broken glass to failure,
A simple promise of a crimson saviour.
Take a look into the life you’re leaving,
I promise you this isn’t pain you’re feeling

I’ll carry you, my darkest desire
When life sings to you through devil’s choirs.
F.E.A.R. won’t steal what burns in you,
I’ll carry you away from the fire.
Wow!

Come on!

I’ll carry you, my darkest desire
When life sings to you through devil’s choirs.
F.E.A.R. won’t steal what burns in you,
I’ll carry you away from the fire.

My desire, devil’s choirs
My desire, devil’s choirs
My desire, devil’s choirs
My desire, devil’s choirs”

In that video Andy Biersack explains to you the readers what the song “Devils Choir” on Wretched and Divine:The Story of the Wild Ones means. The song hits every home run with me medically, emotionally, mentally, and everything that has gone on in my life in the course of 4 plus years I have been battling really serious medical issues. I also provided above the lyrics to “Devils Choir” inside the article I will explain what part of “Devils Choir” forever changed my life. If only I can speak positively enough of about Black Veil Brides as whole. They mean the world to me in so many ways alone with the BVB army know as “The Legion of the Black”.

I am about to open up to the BVB army about what is going on with me and I am hoping I can help some people out if some of the members of the BVB army are suffering these diseases. I don’t like to open up that often about these things cause it’s quite horrible to deal with and very personal at times to talk about. But its time to open up some what to a group of my peers of what is going on.

This week has been one emotional roller coaster to me. I just celebrated my one year anniversary of becoming a BVB fan this Monday on January 27th. A year ago from that day was anything but unhappy and unfortunate from that until BVB came into my life on that day at 11:00 something that night. I had planned to kill myself and take all my sleeping pills known as Trazadone at the time. Reason why I planned to kill myself?

I was tired of being in pain. Severe pain to even put a 600 hundred pound bully to his knees and cringe in pain. I wouldn’t dare wish my headache pain not even on my enemies. My headaches usually range from 5 on the headache pain scale to about 9-10 being at its ultimate worst. It feels like sledgehammers, rocks, blowtorches, and people beating the fuck out of me. The pain gets so bad that I have to go to the emergency room at least 6-7 times a year.

Lets rewind a bit. Back to November of 2009 when my forever permanent headache started to begin. I was a senior in high school at the time. I woke up one day in November of 09’ with it and its the same headache I have now that has never went away. No relief. No cure. No answers by doctors who I went to seek help too. I am labeled what is known as “The problem child” in medicine. I have been to 10 neurologists and they don’t know why someone would just randomly wake up one day with the worlds worst headache on the planet and its never gone away.

The medical doctors who have helped me out to the best of there ability have done wonders for me though. Putting me on the right path to finding answers as to why I got my headaches to begin with.

I have been through a lot within the last 4(6 now) plus years I have been dealing with these horrible headaches. Who has not go through something terrible in their lives. It’s not easy. But one always has to know to keep their head up high in moments of bad and horrible situations. I have that “Never give in, Never back down” attitude about life.

I have 8 major health conditions(Now 2 years later 15 sadly). 4 being life threatening. The rest being severe to minor health conditions. I have one health condition impending(Getting medical testing done at the moment to figure out what is seriously wrong with me) Test tesults came back positve that I had the condition.I have been through the ringer of sorts with medical conditions from birth to now.

I don’t live a normal 22-year-old life now 24. Normal people my age are out partying and doing those things. I prefer to sit at home and party on the internet with a glass of water. I have a very reclusive life. I don’t drink, smoke, do drugs, party, etc. I am pretty plain person. So my version of “Wild” is what you are reading right now. Way to kick the negative in the ass. Plus I have to prepare weeks in advance to do something fun like a concert or a family outing. My headaches are 24 hour, 7 days a week, and 365 days consumes me whole with debilitating pain that hurts so bad that I can’t get out of bed at all but I have too.  I succumbed to an over the counter pain pill addiction that I kept secret to even the family members that live with me. Until a doctor told me in Seattle on March 22nd of last year that if I didn’t stop my over the counter cocktail pain pill addiction. I would be in a coffin six feet under. That alone scared the shit out of me. I did not even know at the time I had this addiction. I am happily ceased all over the counter pain medication that if I do need to take it. It’s under very huge restrictions and medical guidance. Chronic Migraineur’s often do not know what I did without knowing the chemicals and toxins that are slowly killing them. They go on in life with their daily life not knowing their fate could be soon. I am glad to have met the doctor who gave me the tools to save my own life and end my very painful “Invisible addiction” I am very thankful and fortunate. I am currently 11 months clean this month on the 22nd a year next month on the 22nd. It has not been easy but I kicked the addiction in the ass.

I also was given hell by emergency room doctors. Basically “Outcasting” me as a freak and telling me “Its all in my head” which I know my severe pain is in my head but they were referring me to as crazed lunatic their for drugs on the times I visited the ER when my headaches and stomach pains get really bad. I almost once got referred to the fifth floor cause of my severe diseases. I never let it get to me though because I knew I was not anything they were terminologically or wronging me about. Again with the “Never give in, Never back down.” attitude that I was naturally born with as a strength.

I have lived everyday what I refer to as “Hell on earth.” But I don’t let this get to my spirit and get me down. I was not dealt with the greatest genetics on the planet. But I was given a heart of gold and the strength and courage of a lion.

Now I am going to talk about what part of “Devils Choir” that forever changed my life. The line “Take a look into the life you’re leaving, I promise you this isn’t pain you’re feeling” hit me to the core. Core so deep that it resonated with me. Andy wrote the song seeing people he cared about destroying themselves with drugs or alcohol. But what Andy does not know is that with this song and these lyrics he has helped the other side. People who have destroyed themselves cause of pain that one can’t control. Pain that they were genetically encoded like I was to suffer for the rest of my days and their days in not knowing if there is relief at the end of the tunnel or any hope at all for pain to leave us chronic pain suffers alone.

What I am trying to say is. Andy words made me fall in love with Black Veil Brides in such a way that words can’t explain.  I will forever for the rest of my days back the message of Black Veil Brides and who they are as people. My full support, love, dedication, admiration, gratefulness, gratitude, and thankfulness go out to BVB. This also intertwines with the song “Carolyn” which personally touches me deeply and I send my thoughts, heart, prayers, and support to Jake Pitts family who knew his late mother, Carolyn. I can’t explain in words how emotional and mentally enthralling it is to listen to Black Veil Brides music everyday. I am overjoyed by it.

“I promise you this isn’t pain you’re feeling” my interpretation of it is I have been through a hell of a lot and to have a few seconds of hearing through song that I will be okay in the end and there is hope. Makes me believe in the quote “Faith in humanity”. My love and support goes out to the five guys who work their asses off and make such wonderful music. I am overjoyed listening to each and every BVB song out their.

The hardships the BVB army members go through is incredible for me to read and its an honor to be shared their personal feats. Life ain’t easy. It’s what you make of it. I decided to make mine kick ass the best of my ability even the my genetic cards are not the best. I am happy, blessed, and overjoyed to have inspired so many people on the interwebs. I love you all. I do my best that I can. I show my sunshine and you guys and gals give it right back 10x more. It means a great deal to me. Your support and kindness is never took for grant by me.

I am proud to be a Black Veil Brides fan. In that I am proud to represent them around my town in the t-shirts I purchased of theirs. I get the bad comments from the haters. LOL. Then I get the open-minded and lovely fan compliments on my t-shirts everywhere I go. I love that.

Black Veil Brides music is so very personal to me sometimes that I can’t talk about it or be open about it. But I am. I express myself in ways that I have never expressed myself before. BVB got me out of my shell. They have really made my creative mind of words “Take it to the next level” *Hand Rocket* I am very pleased and grateful for everything they have taught me and given to me in advice form.

I hope you the reader has found your niche in the world. Whether it be writing, art, singing, dance, etc. Whatever YOU set your mind to. I know in my heart YOU can do it. Cause I am living and breathing proof that miracles happen. I am not supposed to be alive actually. But I am. I have faced medically feats that even stun doctors. Always remember this quote “Someone else has it way worse than you?” that is what drives me everyday to what I want in life and that is to become a successful rock and roll journalist.

It is that time that I have to wrap up this article. Thank you for taking the time to read it. I know people have busy lives nowadays. So it means a lot to me that you took time out of your day to read what I wrote. Always remember “You’re Not Alone” I know a lot of you feel lonely in the world but we really aren’t if you think about it. We all have similar commonalities whether it be something stupid or very serious. Always remember my quote “Don’t have a party pooper attitude, Never give up.” cause no one wants a party pooper in their party or someone who has a sour puss attitude about life when really it will be alright in the end.

I PROMISE YOU THIS ISN’T PAIN YOUR FEELING, Cause really with this song is my pseudo pain-killer and in the end we will all be alright. I BELIEVE THAT WE ALL FALL DOWN SOMETIMES, Cause its okay to cry it all out and you will be okay in the end. IF I FALL I WILL RISE BACK UP AND RELIVE MY GLORY. Cause we all need redemption and self-worth “In The End”

Written By: Mariah L. Hanna

Copyright @PotatoBVBQueen 2/9/14, Updated 6/18/2016

*See about for ‘Journalist Note’

Second Chances: A Black Veil Brides and BVB Army dedication!

I was inspired by this article by Mandy on twitter. She has helped me among others counsel me to the point where they helped get rid of the BVB hater I once was. This month will be my one year anniversary of being in the BVB army what better way to celebrate it than in a positive light and in teaching or advice manner. Mandy, Amy, and Cindy helped me and give me that well need slap or cold water in my on my face to wake my up. They talked me out of the guilt and shame of being a past BVB hater. The passed is no more and I am ready to live the future and present. Without them I have no clue what I would do. I will express my opinions, advice, and inspiration to people who are afraid to take that step into giving things a second chance even if you absolutely hated it before. I will talk about my experience and counter-act it so that you the reader can use it as your own advantage point to try new music, food, etc.

On January 27th of last year was forever a changing day in my life. I planned on ending my life that day but I ended up killing the BVB hater that was inside of me. I had written my suicide note in full on a document on my computer and obituary. I was going to end my life cause I was tired of being in pain all the time twenty-four seven three hundred sixty-five days out of the year due to my permanent headache conditions that make life a living hell. It wasn’t till a cancer scare sent me over the edge to further go with my plans of doing the disheartening deed. It wasn’t until my plans go intercepted by a band that I did not particularly like at the time I was at my wit’s end. All lost hope was gone. I clicked on they’re video cause I was in a shitty rock bottom mood. But what happened was beautiful. I am still lost for words on it. Andy spoke to me the fucking BVB hater who was going through shit that his fan base has some struggles with. Him and his band mates reached their hand out to me. Told me it was okay. Sometimes we all fall down. To never give in, never back down all in the music video “In The End”. Every inch of my heart that falsely hated BVB was filled with love, admiration, inspiration, respect, and support. They rose me from the ashes and helped guide me on that path that I should have been on cause I was a lost soul for years. I am proud to be a BVB army family member. I have been utterly blessed with love each day by the lovely members of BVB army and who they are as people. I love them all so very much. With all my heart.

YOU the reader can rise from the ashes and have your New Years Day too. Again try new things. Unlike I did I tried a band out for a “Second” time in a disheartening circumstances. BVB where their when I needed someone the most. They understood me and understood what I was going through.  They still even help me out. I can’t believe the wonder and power behind their music. They are one of a kind band. One that can’t be re-created. They have that spark, powerhouse, and magic about them that makes them such an epic fucking band live and I can’t even explain it on CD.

Many people have asked me, told me, or yelled at me. Why do you like this band? Black Veil Brides is a faggot ass band why do you like them so much? You should kill yourself if you like Black Veil Brides so much? How on earth can you stand those freaks? Are you retard? Etc?

What I will aptly reply to all of that. Do your research about the band. Listen to their music. Get educated. Even before you come to me ask me those questions. It’s quite stupid day in and day out to read, hear, or behind someones back receive hate that is just stupid to begin with. So do the world a favor and get educated.

My thoughts on “Second Chances” everyone deserves them. Even the dreaded Black Veil Brides haters. Why? The BVB haters cause some of them are just guided into wrong crowds or social interactions in life. Plus some of the biased media plays a huge role in falsely making BVB haters. Some of the media asshats wants you to believe that BVB are monsters, their out to get you, they are terrible people, and they make shitty music. That they do so and so. When in doubt they do the exact opposite. People, bands, things, etc ALL deserve a “Second” chance whether you like it or not at the time. I absolutely hated BVB falsely not knowing the reasons I hated them were all plagued by the media and people I was hanging out with via the internet. I got rid of those people by extensive research, deleted people out of my life on my social medias, and then started my new life with the BVB army.

It’s quite simple go on the internet preferably on Spotify or YouTube. Type in keyword: Black Veil Brides, Potatoes, or what the fuck it is your afraid or need to put F.E.A.R in its asshole.  My whole world changed when the magic and love of Black Veil Brides music was let in my heart. It was a very beautiful day to be certain. I didn’t go see the clouds that day. The BVB hater that I was did. People who give “Second Chances” to things are amazing people.

It’s just like people who give a dog or kitty cat a “Second Chance” rescue them from the shelter and adopted them. It’s very heartwarming that the person or person’s took that animal into their home to give it love, shelter, and food. So why can’t this happen to people too. Give pets and people “Second Chances”. You may never know YOU might get a grumpy cat person to adopt or the next Lil Bub.

What has my “Second Chance” by allowing Black Veil Brides music into my heart. Its given me friends from all over the world I can count on. Its given me my life back. Its helped me find my person. Its helped me find who I am in the world. Its helped me guide myself to finding my future career which you are reading the words now of it. Its has completed me. Its helped me in ways I can’t explain. I am forever grateful, thankful, and every most overjoyed Black Veil Brides and the BVB army came into my life. YOU all deserve some sort of potato plaque with loads of potato made products.

A “Second Chance” doesn’t mean the end of the world is coming. It means that you are open-minded and stepping out of the box of what is normal. People often think its okay to just live with monotonous lives. People can live that way. I have no problems with it all. To each their own and to their own opinions. Which by the way you are entitled to. I will respect it and you shall respect mine. But don’t have it so it crosses the line period. But people live such monotonous lives that they don’t even try. I am glad I have grown up with a sense of an open mind. So it’s not the end of the world to try something new. Even if it’s once in a while.

Even if you have to give it a third chance so be it. Do what you please. Sing the songs you love. Eat the food that pleases you. Do the activities that make you happy. Do what makes YOU happy. Cause at the end of the day, I am quoting Andy Biersack here, YOU are your own best fan and YOU don’t want to hurt that person. 😉 Treat YOU right. Get help for self harm, suicidal tendencies, etc. Cause its better to have done it verses than I am “Thinking about” it.

I truly hope the best for every one of my readers that comes along and reads my articles old and new. It means a lot to me. Each reader sincerely means the world to me. I can’t explain to all of you that. This is to some of the most lovely fans out their who believed in me when no one else did. Thank you. Here is to your “Second Chances” cause you all deserve them too from people. I wish you all the best wishes in the world along with Black Veil Brides and their families/friends.

I will wrap this article up telling you all what is coming up in with “The Potato Queen” in 2014.  I am hoping to go back to college this year to get a business degree and a minor in either English or creative writing. Preferably creative writing. I hope everything works out cause I had to take an infinite withdrawal from college back in 2011 for a while to get myself well cause I have 6 chronic illnesses and 5 of them are permanent. 2 are life threatening. I have been through so much medically and this a little glimmer of hope that I have for myself In hopes that I can make it in the world without feeling like a failure in society cause of being constantly sick as fuck 24/7 around the calendar. Nothing makes me proud and internally happy than writing. Knowing I have a huge potential in making it as a huge rock and roll journalist proves that “Second Chances” are infinite and real. It’s a true blessing and one that changed my life forever. To know I can get a degree that isn’t going to stress me the fuck out and put my health in to jeopardy is a blessing disguise. This all happened and in thank you’s of Black Veil Brides. I couldn’t thank them enough if I were to meet them face to face. They mean the world to me. I am happy and blessed that I became a loyal fan of theirs. I am overjoyed. Words can’t express my gratitude towards Black Veil Brides, what they stand for, and who they are because they are wonderful, epic , crazy, kind, gentle, beautiful, charismatic, cheerful, supportive, and loving human beings inside and out.

“The Potato Queen’s Articles, Reviews, and fun tiddly bits for 2014”

The Potato Queen’s top Albums for 2013

Reviewing Ronnie Radke’s mix-tape with various artists

Going to Review the hilarious Average Joe: Season 2

Review any band that wants me to review their music

Going to write a few medical pieces

Reviewing We Stitch These Wounds Re-Release whenever the announcement and release of it comes

Going to do small little inspiring articles while BVB is in studio producing CD number 4

January 27th is a little holiday with me. It’s the day I repented. Come celebrate with me on my twitter as I will think of something special to do for BVB that day in commemoration. It also marks a year that I haven’t had one single suicidal thought ever. It’s the small feats that counts. \m/

Throughout the year just keep checking my blog for updates, articles, rants, reviews, etc  to come your way. I am excited to start my journey as an amateur journalist. I send my love and wishes to everyone. Hope everyone has a Happy New Year. A kick ass one too.

Happy New Year and here is to “Second Chances” in 2014,

Written By: Mariah L. Hanna

Copyright @PotatoBVBQueen 1/8/14

*Journalists Note moved to About page in archives. Thank you for your concern. Best of wishes.

NEVER GIVE IN..NEVER BACK DOWN..NEVER GIVE IN..NEVER BACK DOWN…WHEN YOUR LIFE FEELS LOST(FIGHT AGAINST ALL ODDS!).. NEVER GIVE IN..NEVER BACK DOWN- BLACK VEIL BRIDES